5 Ways To Stop Yelling At Your Kids

Yelling a lot at your kid and feeling guilty about it later? Want to stop such reaction and begin to learn to respond? Here are some things that might help.
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Yelling a lot at your kid and feeling guilty about it later? Do you feel like you’re dumping your frustration on your children? Here are some things that might help.

Parenting is more about how we respond than how the child is behaving”. The split second between bad behaviour and your response defines your “Parenting”. 

Yelling is an instinct and a pattern. A pattern we can break with consistent effort and an attempt to bond better with the child. Yelling comes as a function of –

  1. Our own childhood pattern of being raised.
  2. Our inability to feel in control of things
  3. Not having any other solution to offer
  4. Being triggered by external factors like sleep, fatigue, stress etc.

Is Your Child Responsible?

No right? We need to understand that our anger and their behaviour are not related. Children are innocuously, emotionally driven and have limited control over their impulses due to a developing brain.

Adults have matured and developed brains. We can work towards a harmonious and fostering environment for the child. Our children are the real mirrors of our behaviours and personalities

Ask yourself today – “What model of yourself do you wish to see in your child?”

  • A regulated, mindful individual who thinks before responding and values relationships.

Or

  • A confused, dysregulated individual who yells and shouts and is unable to handle his impulses and anger

Simple Yet Very Effective Ideas To Avoid Yelling At Your Child:

  1. When you feel a surge of anger, walk out of the room. Stand up, and move your body and limbs. This helps your brain to snap out of the angry emotion. Also, never leave without informing your child. You set a foundation for walking out when you feel anger. He’s learning to understand how to handle anger.
  1. Redirect your energy – Laugh out loud, Roar or stamp to let out the frustration. Also, laughing sends a signal to your brain that this is not a dangerous situation to put you in fight, flight, freeze mode.
  1. Keep Expectations Real – Understand what your child is really capable of doing. Be realistic about the time he can sit and the milestones he can achieve. This will keep you sorted.
  1. Pause – A brief pause changes your reaction to response and will really help you to manage your impulse to yell.
  1. Mindfulness – A brief 10 mins a day to connect with your inner senses and identify your real triggers will work wonders on all your relationships. Visualise yourself as calm and peaceful when dealing with your child. Visualisation is powerful and helps build a pattern of calm in your brain!

Parenting is more about what we feel than what the child is feeling. Every relationship is a peep inside our own selves. Work and trust your connection with your child. Pardon yourself if you yell and work on a consistent growth pattern.

You are a good parent because you are reading this.

Be more curious than furious.

Remember: Connection is the way to harmonious and beautiful relationships.

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