The moms of boys (MOB) community is a close-knit one. By close-knit, I don’t mean we meet every weekend for drinks and hugs, by that I mean we give each other the nod when we pass by in crowded hallways or crowded emergency rooms. Because we just know what its like to be outnumbered by boys in our own house.
So here is a list for all moms-to-be expecting boys, for moms of boys to secretly nod and agree, and for all those moms looking at their daughters and hoping the next one will be a boy. This in a few points is what it is like being a mom of boys.
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1. Queen of your castle: Let's start with the good shall we? If you have a house full of boys, you will be the reigning queen of the castle. Your boys form their opinions about women from the way you are and behave, so while the pressure is on you to be the best you can at all times, always remember that you are the queen of their hearts and they will treat you like one when they really feel like it. If you want to know how you can raise a feminist son, click here.
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2. Embrace the mess: Coz there will be a lot of it. There will be no one helping you clean up the messes, but as soon as you clean one up and turn around, there will be another one. Be prepared for spilt milk and dirty tablecloth corners. Be prepared for dirty toilet sinks and strewn toy cars. For decapitated superhero figures and torn out stuffed toy eyeballs. There will be messes and until you can learn to embrace it, you will not have a single day of peace.
3. Be prepared to NEVER have a clean toilet again: It is a universal truth that boys are equipped (physically) a little differently than girls but what is unknown is that young boys cannot (and do not care to) control aforementioned physicality. With two boys, a male dog (and cough, cough husband) in the house, I find myself having to clean, nay scrub, bathrooms down daily because no one knows how to aim. Don't sprinkle when you tinkle is a legit song in my house.
4. Redefine your standards of safety: If you want to be a mom of boys you must have your paediatrician and the nearest emergency room on speed dial. You must also be well versed with the human anatomy because you need to know what a fracture looks like, sounds like and when a bump on the head is serious enough to need a trip to the doctor. Boys find new ways of entertaining themselves and this means jumping from sofas onto tables and then on to a box, or simply swinging by the curtains like Tarzan or even hitting each other with things for the fun of it. So you need to equip yourself with the knowledge of when a fall or a cut is really dangerous.
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5. Food and lots of it: It doesn't matter if your boys are going through a growth spurt or not, eating or snacking is something they do, a lot! So be prepared to make big pots full of dosa batter or have a dozen egg recipes up your sleeve.
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6. Strange noises: I've recently discovered this and even read a study which stated that boys tend to make sounds to express themselves. While girls can articulate or 'use their words', boys simply hoot, whistle, grunt, snort or (insert sound here).
7. Games can get strange: I don't know if they come programmed that way, but games can border on the weird. Like who can kick the highest with a shoe on the freshly painted wall or how many places on the body can you punch and still not get hurt. It is like Fight Club, day in and day out at my place.
But despite all the crazies (and am sure moms can add more), moms of boys have the gargantuan task of raising young, totally adorable, munchkin-faced little boys, into responsible and loving men so that the women they meet can come back and thank us. Sounds about right? Challenge accepted!