Bombay To Goa. What It Means To Move To A Smaller City, Shares Mom Priyanka Bakhru

This article is contributed by Priyanka Bakhru Talwar for Kidsstoppress.com. Priyanka Bakhru Talwar is a counselor, clinical hypnotherapist, writer and holistic healing practitioner. She specialises in relationship counseling, inner child therapies and Mindful Parenting.

For those of us bringing up children in a metro, there are occasional twinges of yearning for a simpler life, cleaner and greener and less technology afflicted. To not need a car and driver and nannies to shuttle kids to and from school, parks, classes and play centres. To not have our kids wait in lines for a swing or slide. To not be concerned about accidents and crime. The days when birthday parties meant sandwiches, chips, cake and juice. The good ol’ days of kids running around, playing with a bat and ball and marbles for hours on end.

My husband and I decided to move to Goa when our daughter was three. This wasn’t only about her, it had been something we had been planning for a while. Goa was, for us, the perfect Indian choice…thanks to the expat and European communities, it has all big-city amenities, good schooling and a global culture. Great roads, beaches, gardens, pollution-free. Multiple airlines and flights in and out. Fantastic dining and entertainment with Michelin star chefs, world class DJs and festivals, a solid music, art and literary culture. Tons of healthy outdoor options like bicycling clubs, trekking, jeep rallies etc. And enough friends and acquaintances who had already made the city home. In short, it seemed perfect.

Almost everyone we know in Mumbai and Delhi seems to view our choice as admirable and aspirational. We constantly get quizzed with hows and wows. And it truly has been great. Here are all the delight factors:

• The space. This is absolutely awesome. The houses are bigger, the ceilings higher, the complexes and gardens and swimming pools and gyms and club rooms are great. Visual space too. Views of oceans and fields and rivers. Uninterrupted. Roads and sidewalks for runs and drives. Large, open restaurants. Huge and charming stores and boutiques. It makes you feel luxurious.
• The luck for your buck. It’s easy to feel rich. Rents are comparatively ridiculously low. Dining and entertainment is a breeze. Club and hotel memberships, no problem.
• The organic living. Vegetables and fruits taste better. No pollution. You suddenly realize how much energy you have just because your cells are getting more oxygen. Not to mention the holistic and wellness madness. Yoga at every corner. It just pulls you in, to explore and to experience.
• The simplicity of people. They are just nicer. Less jaded, not in a rush, not stressed. Not distracted. All the time in the world. Even the kids. A twelve year old is still a child, not a teenager already.
• A more natural childhood. Kids of all ages gather together in the evenings, play, skate, chat and run around. They go to the beach and come back with rocks and shells, and sand everywhere. Play dates at home.

Having said that, we got out of the metro, but it isn’t easy to get the metro out of us. So for all of you planning or dreaming of a shift to a smaller town; here is a list of things to be prepared for.

• The pace is slow. I mean it, slow. You will enjoy it for a while, but it will not pick up when you want a faster pace. There will be moments when you want the energy, the buzz, the enthusiasm of a busy city on-the-go. You won’t get it. After 9 p.m., residential areas will be mostly dark. On weekdays, restaurants will be empty. All stores will go shutter-down for afternoon siesta.
• Power cuts and Sundays are a thing. No one works on a Sunday in Goa. Not the garbage disposers, nor the chemist. And your household staff takes an off too! If you live in the city, power cuts will not be a big concern, and infrastructure is good. But if you aim for that charming Portuguese house in a village, then you will have to deal with no electricity, a lot.
• Small town familiarity is alien, but it’s a reality. Goa is a state, right? So the area you live is your zone. After a while, you bump into the same people everywhere. The multiplex, the mall, the pub, the supermarket. If that is too much for your privacy, then don’t do the move.
• The people are slower too. I absolutely do not mean this in a negative way. I just believe that metro-ites are more hyper-active, their normal is faster. Just used to action and noise. This applies to kids too. People want to chill about, doing nothing. That’s why they chose this life. They don’t want to make too many plans, or be too hectic.
• Your source of income should either cater to tourism, or be place agnostic. If you are a writer, consultant, trainer, director, DJ etc. and get gigs unrelated to Goa, you are sorted. But if your plans include a job and income here, it will not match a metro. Prepare for that.
• Public transport, what’s that? You have to have your own wheels. It’s a very large place, Goa. And you have to be able to drive everywhere. No other way. This is true of almost everywhere in India that’s not a metro.

Make sure to move when your children are young – to a small city or back to a metro. Once they get used to the vibe of a place it will become difficult to move. You will fit back in, the children may feel overwhelmed. So either choose it permanently, or while they are young.

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