Flying With Toddlers? Mom Of 2 Shares Winning Tips To Keep Kids Whine-Free!

Travelling with toddlers isn’t easy- but here’s how you can ace it!
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Creating an air of excitement while setting realistic expectations:

The first thing I began to do as soon as plans started firming up, was to create an air of excitement at home. Toddlers are naturally curious creatures and a few details here and there adds value to their experience. So, I began telling my toddler little by little about the upcoming travel, about aeroplanes, about the long-haul in-flight experience (everything including the tiny toilets, the small trays of food, the cramped seats (as there's also a lap infant with me), the entertainment etc.)

We drew aeroplanes on her chalkboard. We watched videos of planes taking off and landing. We learnt some of the parts of an aeroplane and how they function (like flaps on the wings, like the turbines underneath the wings, the wheels etc). Eventually, she knew theoretically what she needed to do from the moment we got off the cab at the airport. I later realized how much this helped her handle her emotions herself.

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Assigning responsibility:

We let our toddler in on all the shopping, on the packing, on encouraging her to get her stuff ready ahead of time by herself – which meant she was given responsibilities and made to feel important. We played memory games with her by creating a mental list. She chose some of her clothes for the trip and partly packed her own bag. But remember, too much effort on this can overwhelm or tire them out.

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Plan ahead. Draft checklists:

When you have kids in the equation, nothing really goes 100% according to plan. So I prefer to make a list or ten, begin packing early and getting all travel documents in order as soon as possible. Being avid travellers, my spouse and I can't stress enough on the importance of lists and running through them at the end. Also, there needs to be room for contingencies like health setbacks. Mental tiredness/exhaustion is real and widespread when you need to pack for three people instead of one. As is brain-freeze.

So, the takeaway here is to remember to cut yourself some slack and you know you are already halfway down to doing a great job.

Packing snacks and a familiar water bottle:

Sometimes, hunger is the root-cause of tantrums. Pack some snacks which you know they will not reject when hungry, but that doesn't mean packets of sugar-laden cereal or biscuits. Whole wheat chocolate rock buns/cookies and baked carrot/sweet potato sticks helped us in a couple of our trips, for instance.

The buns barely had any added sugar – but I threw in some dark chocolate chips in them that made up for it. But don't crank up their energy by feeding them high-sucrose food; that's the last thing you want. Also, remember to adhere to the rules of the land, so if you carry dairy or fruit, it becomes harder to get through to your destination smoothly after landing in case you forget to trash the leftovers. Wholemeal crackers or muffins, baked falafels, broccoli tots – there are quite a few options for those willing to explore.

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Wear the baby wherever whenever:

The baby-carrier has been the single most amazing human invention that has gotten me zipping through my parenting journey so far. I can't imagine what my life would have been like without a baby carrier. My go-to for soothing crying babies or upset-toddlers has almost always been a baby-carrier. But this requires a fair bit of effort to habituate. You can't suddenly get your baby strapped onto you and expect them to love the experience instantly. So, I suggest investing in an ergonomic baby carrier when the baby is young, and feel the magic that baby-wearing brings into your life, especially if you are a stay-at-home-mother like me. Also, travelling is only one of the experiences that becomes simpler when wearing your baby. There are a host of other day-to-day activities that a baby-carrier helps you with. Also, when travelling with children, a foldable umbrella-stroller probably makes things easier and some airports (like Singapore) have strollers available on a FCFS basis. Do ask the airline about this arrangement beforehand.

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Travel as light as possible:

After travelling solo with two toddlers, my preference is to travel as light as possible. I realized how light luggage makes for easier times during transit and at places where I have to fetch my luggage myself from the baggage carousel with a baby strapped on to me and a toddler clinging on. So for the trip, recycling clothes, sticking to a bare minimum and going local with necessities like diapers/ toiletries/food etc helps lighten the luggage load considerably. I never travelled with a pressure cooker/food premixes etc – because my children like to eat what we eat for the most part. But depending on the baby's needs, I always carry medication, creams and lotions the baby is used to, because I don't want to experiment and deal with a rash later on.

For the flight, my carry-on baggage would typically have extra diapers / an extra set of clothing or two for the kids and one for me, (also extra formula, if using) so that I am equipped for delays. I also remember to pack one light-weight toy and a book for each of the children, some erasable crayons, colour pens, sticker sheets, a thin plain drawing book, and stencils because my daughter loves them.

So before the long-haul flight, I bought two new stencils and surprised her with them on board. That kept her engaged for a good hour. As a welcome improvisation, I got some paper cups from the crew and those worked like a charm on both kids.

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Arrive Early:

Check-in through the internet if that's possible or arrive well before your usual check-in time. This is so you can avoid long queues at the counter. Children get really restless having to stand in queues and you don't want to begin your journey on a stressful note.

In-flight preparations:

1. As far as possible, I avoid the seats in the middle row especially on long flights, even for myself. What works for me when travelling with two, is a window seat and the adjacent middle seat. A window gives my toddler some moments of excitement like the sunrise or cloud patterns and works very well especially during take-off and landing.

2. When travelling with a lap infant, one automatically gets assigned the bassinet in all likelihood depending on the availability while booking. After several attempts at using one, I can safely say bassinets really help small babies get cosy, but are not very useful for babies who are mobile. If the baby is more than 6-7 months old and can stand, then it becomes a hassle to use the bassinet – it ends up being a dump basket and reduces moving space. So even if I do get assigned a bassinet seat, I normally request not to get mine out, for want of leg room, tray table room and entertainment-console room. Also remember that my toddler seated next to me, would most likely want to stretch her legs having both the tray table and the entertainment console out all the time.

3. I have always breastfed my lap infant during take-off and landing. Breastfeeding helps the baby equalize the pressure in both ears during a rapid change in altitude. Bottle-fed babies would perhaps gain from feeding through a slow-flow nipple. Pacifiers/dummies would help the same purpose too. I nursed using the cradle hold position with the head raised above the torso.

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4. Dressing the children in clothes that cover their arms and legs helps keep them slightly warm as the cabin temperature can get slightly low. Thick socks will also help especially during long flights.

5. A very important tip this one – take your potty-trained trained children to the toilet before take-off/landing. Experience speaks here!

Finally, let me give some credit to the most important person instrumental in consistently making this experience as smooth as it can get – no, not the child(ren) – but myself. Yes, in retrospect, I realize just how much effort goes unrecognized and so here goes! And no, it is not to boast, but how you keep your demeanour is the make-or-break of this experience. Yes, there are speed-breakers like over-excited children, tired baby / exhausted mommy, glaring co-passengers who won't think twice before passing judgement etc.

But pick your battles. Have reasonable expectations of your children who are your focus; you know best where their buttons are. When there is a loud tantrum, the goal is to de-escalate the situation, not to push or intimidate further.

If you let any stress get to your head, it will land on the poor unsuspecting children, of course. That is definitely avoidable if you numb your skull to a realistic level, stay confident and put on a facade of keeping a cool head, at the least.

With that, I hope you have a happy journey taking your tots places and giving them a world view of things. In good time, they will get accustomed to the changes that travel brings, in anticipation of the excitement it provides. However things turn out, don't let travel woes dampen your spirits. Remember it is another wonderful memory you create with your children, that you can look back, learn from and laugh at/with them later on. Au revoir!