Meera (name changed) says in a candid talk over a cup of coffee, “I hate family functions of late”. Her irritation is understandable. She is living her dreams- swiftly climbing up the ladder in an MNC, in her early thirties, happily married and has traveled a fair share of the world. Many women I know would kill for a life like Meera’s. But for her family and its extended members, she is “not yet settled”. Her high-profile job and a happy marriage don’t feature in her book of life,  according to them. She is often asked by pesky relatives and colleagues about when she was planning to give them the “good news”. She understood the subtle hints and initially resorted to humour by stating that her recent promotion at work is the “good news”, but she soon found out that didn’t work well with the irksome group. Tired of having to answer why she isn’t a mother yet and exhausted by convincing people about her choices, she decided to stay away from potential questioning grounds.
No Uterus, No Opinion!
Meera isn’t alone. Remember in one of the F.R.I.E.N.D.S episodes, how Rachel Green snapped at Ross when he gave her unsolicited pregnancy advice? “No uterus, no opinion”!  And quite so, Rachel Green in real life, Jennifer Aniston has given a similar retort. Irritated by the constant questions on her pregnancy by the paparazzi, Aniston decided to pen her thoughts on a blog on Huffington Post . “For the record, I am not pregnant. What I am is fed up” is what the Hollywood star had to say. “The way I am portrayed by the media is simply a reflection of how we see and portray women in general, measured against some warped standard of beauty”.
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This is true for women, all over the world. After a few years of marriage (if not few months), women are constantly reminded of their “duties” and “responsibilities” and are bogged down by the usual questions related to pregnancy and about starting a family. Surprisingly, men get away from such awkward questions and it is always the wife who is in the eye of the scrutiny. When famous Hollywood star Keira Knightley was asked how she balances her personal and professional life, she just had this to say – “Are you going to ask all the men that tonight?” Perfecto!
Is Motherhood the measure of a woman’s success?
Motherhood is definitely an important part of womanhood, we aren’t denying. But why is a woman’s achievement only measured by when she “settles down” and “starts a family”? Aren’t there other measures to define a woman’s success? Sania Mirza, India’s star tennis player who has been chiefly responsible for putting India on the world map in the game, gave a perfect reply in a recent interview. When a prominent anchor asked her questions about when she was planning to settle down and start a family, the ace player got back in true style.
Image source: Pink Revolution
Actress Twinkle Khanna joined the long list of people who tweeted their support to Mirza.
Like the embarrassing aunt we all had who pestered us about ‘settling down’-I guess the nation has found a new bua https://t.co/NI3h73ItoW
— Twinkle Khanna (@mrsfunnybones) July 15, 2016
Image source: twitter.com
In spite of the numerous awareness that is created over women’s rights in defining their life and decisions, societal pressures still play a key role in a woman’s career. Constant reminders about the ticking biological clock and the need to raise a responsible family often hamper a woman’s progress in the field she chooses to. The decision to become a mother is something that a woman needs to make on her own and shouldn’t be influenced upon by others.
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Remember ladies, it’s your life. To do, or not to do is a question you have to solely answer. And remember- “kuch toh log kahenge. Logon ka kaam hee kehna”!
Image source: bigdays.in
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Parul Gupta
Mansi Zaveri
KSP Team
