Serena Williams: On Choosing Family Over Tennis

Thank you Serena. Thank you for the memories. Thank you for breaking the glass ceiling, repeatedly. Thank you for teaching our little girls to aim higher. Thank you for showing moms that we are unstoppable. And thank you for normalising the struggles of a working mom.
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The sports world was in a state of shock last evening when the GOAT- Serena Williams announced her retirement from tennis after the US Open later this year. Undoubtedly the greatest female sportsperson we have seen in recent years, Serena has been a champion on and off the field and has won the hearts of parents, especially moms for often opening up on relatable topics like mom guilt, working while you are pregnant, and balancing home and a flourishing career.

And yesterday, the 23-Grand Slam title holder, decided to call it quits. And while we are still reeling in the shock, we came across this superbly written article by Serena herself on Vogue. We are amazed at how she has found comfort in her decision and her candid approach to expressing the same. Be it a Grand Slam winner or a mom juggling a 9-5 job, the struggles are the same. And tough decisions are made day in, day out.

Thank you Serena. Thank you for the memories. Thank you for breaking the glass ceiling, repeatedly. Thank you for teaching our little girls to aim higher. Thank you for showing moms that we are unstoppable. And thank you for normalising the struggles of a working mom.

In case you missed the Vogue article here is the link. And if you are time-starved, I have broken down the most powerful quotes by Serena that will stay with me, a fellow mom, who is juggling between work, deadlines, client pressure, pressure cooker whistles and a demanding toddler.

Do Men Face This Problem Like Women Do?

For a legend who continued to play when pregnant, soon after the baby was born and when breastfeeding, she says, the question of work vs family isn’t unexpected. As a woman, I can relate to that. We are asked that way too often which makes us think if our choices are perceived as selfish. Are they?

Believe me, I never wanted to have to choose between tennis and a family. I don’t think it’s fair. If I were a guy, I wouldn’t be writing this because I’d be out there playing and winning while my wife was doing the physical labor of expanding our family.

Choosing To Be There For Our Kids

Just like how working moms are often shamed or judged for their decisions, I need to confess that SAHM or WFH moms aren’t spared either. They are seen as someone who put their dreams behind, who ride without ambition, or ones who “spoil their child too much with their presence” The GOAT silences them all, and how!

Earlier in my career, I never thought about having kids. There were times when I’ve wondered if I should ever bring kids into this world, with all its problems. I was never that confident or comfortable around babies or children, and I figured that if I ever did have a baby, I would have people taking care of it 24/7. I’m not going to lie—I definitely have a lot of support. But I’m also an incredibly hands-on mother. My husband will tell you I am too hands-on. In five years, Olympia has only spent one 24-hour period away from me. This past year, while I was recovering from a hamstring injury, I got to pick her up from school four or five days a week, and I always looked forward to seeing her face light up when she walked out of the building and saw me waiting there for her. The fact is that nothing is a sacrifice for me when it comes to Olympia. It all just makes sense. Whatever she likes, I like.

Are We Guilty Of Raising Entitled Kids?

One common line we often hear from the fraternity is ” I don’t want my child to wait or miss on anything good in their life. They need to have everything I couldn’t get in my childhood”. While that sounds aww-some, are we doing it right in moulding our children? Serena breaks it down beautifully why kids need to work hard to get what they want.

When you’re younger, you see kids having fun, and you want to do that stuff but you know you have to be on the court, hoping that one day it will all pay off. I got pushed hard by my parents. Nowadays so many parents say, “Let your kids do what they want!” Well, that’s not what got me where I am. I didn’t rebel as a kid. I worked hard, and I followed the rules. I do want to push Olympia—not in tennis, but in whatever captures her interest. But I don’t want to push too hard. I’m still trying to figure out that balance.

Being Clear In What You Want, As A Mom

Agreed. Certainty in life goes for a toss once you are a parent (or wish to become one!) We can’t plan things to perfection. But as moms, what we can do, is to stand by our decisions. Remember, you have the best interest of your child and family at heart when you take every decision along the way. Don’t let the naysayers get to you, by saying you don’t! Serena’s clarity in having another child is so inspiring!

In the last year, Alexis and I have been trying to have another child, and we recently got some information from my doctor that put my mind at ease and made me feel that whenever we’re ready, we can add to our family. I definitely don’t want to be pregnant again as an athlete. I need to be two feet into tennis or two feet out.

Forget The Past. Move On

As moms, not only do we drown in self-guilt, but we also tend to steer towards self-sympathy, rueing over the missed opportunities, and wondering the dreaded “What If”. The secret to a happier life as a mom- don’t regret your past. Don’t regret your decisions. Hear it from the Tennis veteran who nonchalantly admits how she could have scaled greater heights, but doesn’t regret choosing family over fame. What a legend!

The way I see it, I should have had 30-plus Grand slams. I had my chances after coming back from giving birth. I went from a C-section to a second pulmonary embolism to a Grand slam final. I played while breastfeeding. I played through postpartum depression. But I didn’t get there. Shoulda, woulda, coulda. I didn’t show up the way I should have or could have. But I showed up 23 times, and that’s fine. Actually it’s extraordinary. But these days, if I have to choose between building my tennis résumé and building my family, I choose the latter.

What is your story like? Tell us in the comments below. And can we all take a moment to applaud the GOAT for this clarity and candidness and for putting working moms on the global pedestal?!

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