Indian kids have uniquely Indian parents. Wherever we go in the world our parents ask the exact same questions. So as a fun exercise we thought up of 15 questions that we as parents should once and for all stop asking.
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1. Did you have a glass of milk?
A typical Indian mom begins and ends her day with what looks like her only preoccupation.
2. Have you finished your homework?
Every time your child wants to  do something fun like watch a movie or go out and play, the first question that any desi parent will ask is, “Have you done your homework?” as if the prerequisite to fun is having to finish homework!
3. How much did your friend get?Â
Who hasn’t heard this one? Indian parents have to know in what order their child ranks compared to their child’s closest friend. We can’t sleep if we don’t compare.
4. What do you want to become when you grow up?
This is a question that spans the whole range of grownups. Everyone is curious to know what a child wants to grow up to be – and the answer better be doctor or engineer.
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5. Whom do you love more mummy or daddy?
In all possibilities this question will come from a super emotional desi mom, checking up on how much her kids love her or if she is a good mom to her kids?
6. Why do your friends have such weird haircuts?
Desi parents must and will ask this question even though their children will hate how much their parents judge their friends!
7. Do you know how much Sharmaji’s son is earning?
Enter the typical Indian father who will continue to compare salaries long after report card marks have been buried.
8. Who is that boy you were talking to?
A question which actually means, “Don’t let me catch you talking to any boy ever again in your entire life!”
9.Why haven’t  you accepted my Facebook friend request ?
This is a relatively modern one where parents now want in on their child’s social network page just to snoop around.
10. Are you dating anyone?
This question will put any child in the spotlight, irrespective of where it is asked! Can a child ever speak the truth here?
11. Are you going to learn cooking anytime soon?Â
A typical desi mom always worries about how her daughter will please her husband or her in laws if she cannot accomplish the nearly impossible task of making round chapatis.
12. When are you planning to settle down (read get married)?
This is asked by parents, well wishers, cousins, aunts, uncles or basically any grownup. It is as though once you hit your twenties this milestone must be achieved or something evil will befall you!
13. When are you giving us the good news?Â
Post the ‘good news’ of your wedding, you can expect this question to pop up within the year. Good news in this sense means, “When are you having a baby?”
14. Are you going to continue with your work after becoming a mom ?
And just as soon as you announce the baby good news, this will be the next question to answer.
15. And then when are you having the second baby?
Because a desi Indian family portrait is incomplete without a real brother or a sister for the first child.
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