As the husbandman sets off for sail again leaving me as the sole caretaker of our 2-year-old, I find myself oddly not dreading the times ahead. You see both me and tot are now used to this routine of ours which may seem strange to you. My husband's job requires him to be away at sea for 3-4 months at a stretch and then he is back home on vacation for the same amount of time.
I remember the time when we were blissfully married sans I would wonder how I would make it until he got home from sailing. But now that we have a tiny human in the mix, I find myself oddly enjoying these periods alone with her minus her Daddy dearest.
Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband to bits. He is without a doubt the best father and the most supportive husband. And if you ask me how difficult it is to raise a two-year-old alone I would probably need two days for my rant and I would just be getting warmed up.
But I want this post to be a positive ray of sunshine and so I present to my – PIC (Parent In Charge) Perk List
We Do Things My Way!
I am the one and only parent in charge and as any good despot will tell you, it's much easier to rule when you don't have to compromise. Yup, I'm that despot and the home is my kingdom.
All Weekdays Are School Days:
The kiddo would cry while being woken up and Daddy's heart would melt and I would have two pairs of puppy dog eyes begging for no school day one more time! Now we are off to school every day without a peep. It helps because school days mean a routine for her and I know in advance how my day is planned.
I thrive on them. If you ask me what my plan is for June. I would rattle it off day-wise without a blink. Can't say the same when Dad is in town. He treats our days at home as you would your Sundays. Routines be damned! I like the spontaneity too but my OCD tends to flare up with the thought of not knowing.
Embracing My Weaknesses:
Parenting is so much more relaxing when the only person you have to listen to is yourself.
Nothing makes life more difficult than other people's standards and high expectations.
When I'm on my own I'm able to embrace my weaknesses as a parent and a homemaker. Do you wish to watch that Paw Patrol episode for 5 more minutes while Mama has her cup of tea in peace? Sure, go-ahead.
That's breakfast for dinner. So I cook only once a day in the morning and we have the same thing for all three meals. Less hassle and no one is complaining! It's usually a gravy and a side of veggies to be had with rice in the afternoons and with chapattis in the evening. As opposed to cooking three meals a day when the husband is home. I don't mind it either because he appreciates my cooking but who doesn't look forward to a whole day of NOT cooking… Me!
Not only do I tend to wrap myself in a blanket made of poor choices but I have a muffler knit of lethargy for days when I am parenting alone. Do I feel bad about watching not one but two Netflix movies back to back at night without a care of the No Mobiles in bed rule that I made? Absolutely Not! It's another thing that I will function like a zombie the next day and vow never to repeat it again.
Being The Boss:
In his absence, I also have to take over all the roles which are traditionally reserved for the male of the house. I love that he trusts me enough to make 90% of the decisions regarding our family especially those pertaining to our finances.
Besides the normal meal planning, meal making, grocery shopping, school events, birthday parties to taking the car to be serviced, calling and handling all repairmen and lately meeting with the architect, the list is endless.
But I love being the boss of our home and I love that my husband appreciates all the effort I put in.
I make time for my girlfriends or even my daughters’ playdates. When he is around, the inherent guilt of having such little time with him is so strong that I try to keep all such plans to the minimal and step out only if absolutely necessary.
No shaving. Of Anything. Enough said!
But absence makes the heart grow fonder. The welcome home is the MOST FUN part of being away. And no matter how much I enjoy this solo parenting gig, I will never mentally stop crossing the dates off the calendar waiting for him to be back.