This Dad Decided To Take Time Off From Work- Here’s Why

I walked away from a fairly successful and evolving career earlier this year.  And I did it for one reason and one reason only – to spend time with my family.  
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"I did it.  I did what many people thought was foolish and a few thought was sensible.  I did what many people are scared to do at this stage in their lives/careers. 

I walked away from a fairly successful and evolving career earlier this year.  And I did it for one reason and one reason only – to spend time with my family.  

When Kian was born, I was back at work within 2 weeks of his birth and didn’t get to spend a lot of time with him. Of course, I got some bits of the night shift, the burping and nappy changes, but I felt like I missed all the best bits. And so, when Trisha was born in June this year, I figured I would not let the same happen. The decision was affirmed as I held her in one arm and checked the constantly buzzing phone to keep up with the flowing emails from work with the other.  This is definitely not worth it anymore, I told myself.  And that’s when I knew it was time and that I needed a change.

I have already talked about what a good and successful year 2018 was for me professionally, culminating with being promoted to head a team at Barclays.  But also the fact that it came with a lot of effort and sacrifice…particularly on the family front. And so, having reached that peak in 2018, I figured there wasn’t much else to do there. It was the kids and family that warranted, and more importantly, deserved my attention. And so, in the fall this year, I just walked away from a 13-year successful career in banking.

I guess as I look back on the decision, I was fortunate enough to have had the opportunity and the means to do so, and could, therefore, do so with little worries or pressure.  Yes, you always think about the future and what-ifs, but this was for the future anyway… mine and the family’s.  We are ok financially (not millionaires or anything, in case anyone is wondering, but can live comfortably for a bit) and more importantly, neither of us feels like we are unemployable. If I was taking a break now, I would most definitely be able to find another opportunity a bit further down the line. Surely, someone would hire me and/or Gaile. 

If they couldn’t see why I left or why I gave up my job, then I am not sure I wanted to work for them anyway. 

But you’re old to make such a change!

You’re too experienced/senior for anyone to hire you.

You have too much banking experience.

We can’t afford you.

Who’s going to hire you now, at this age and stage of your career?

What about the economy?  There are no jobs out there at the moment!

Are you sure you know what you’re doing?  

You get all sorts of questions and responses when you tell someone you are doing something like this. It creates doubts in your own mind and makes you question your decision.  But again, if you know what you want, then there should be nothing that stops you…

And so, four months down the line, as I look back on the decision, I feel nothing but happiness, joy and satisfaction. I almost want to pat myself on my back for this decision.  I had read about people taking career breaks – going off into the mountains to meditate, cooking, volunteering, travelling, all sorts of things to just get away – for me this was my break from it all. This was my chance to disconnect from the constant hustle of today’s corporate culture.  It was also a chance for me to connect with a different side of me,  and discover the true parent in me. I have absolutely enjoyed every bit of it – the school drops, the birthday parties, the play dates, visits to museums, the morning wake-ups and cuddles, listening to endless tales about imaginary friends, toys, stories from school … nappy changes for the little one… yes, even the tantrums of a 3-year old sometimes. 

I learnt to be patient; I learnt to negotiate with a toddler and I learnt what it is to be a good parent. To listen… to just be there with them when they need you the most.

I learnt many of life’s lessons just watching and listening to my three-year-old son – things I would have never thought of or could never have appreciated just going through the daily grind – innocence, honesty, wonder, curiosity, amazement – these are all things we have left behind as we have got caught up in our daily lives.  It was good to have seen it all so closely through the eyes of a 3-year old.  I have enjoyed it so much so that today when Kian tells me, “Papa, I don’t want you to go back to work anymore”, it just breaks my heart and makes me want to continue staying at home.

Alas!  All good things must come to an end though and as much as I would like to respect Kian’s wishes, I know it will be time to go back to work in the near future. But I am thankful for the opportunity life afforded me.  And if you as a working parent can ever afford to do the same, I would strongly encourage you to take that time away and enjoy the best moments of your kids’ lives…It is as good, if not better than meditation, yoga, travel and anything else… and it probably even costs you less. Why? Because before you know it, this time will be gone…   you can always meditate, travel, yoga, diet, run… everything else later but those formative years will never come back. So, as Nike tells you, 'Just do it!'    

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