All of us do this. And we are guilty about it. Don’t you think we need to change the narrative and give us some benefit of doubt?
We see moms on Instagram and wonder if we could be as hands-on as them. Sometimes we wonder and judge how they can put so much of their personal life on social media.
The biggest question is how do we measure up? It’s oh so easy to do, especially as new parents. We need benchmarks. We want to know how we are doing. There are so many things that we have to make decisions about. And we make them based on research, based on advice, and based on what we’ve seen that we liked or didn’t like. And we don’t know how any of it is going to turn out in the long run, so we look around us.
But is there any need for any comparison, parents? Aren’t we perfect for our family the way we are? Every parent must remember that.
Replace Comparison With Something Else
- Curiosity
- Empathy/Sympathy
- Love
- Understanding
Here’s what parents need to remember about themselves when they feel low about themselves.
Your Child, Your Unique Blessing:
Because no two children are alike, parenting is such a wonderfully varied experience. Your relationship with your child is unique because they are a unique person. Keep in mind that the characteristics and difficulties that make your child special also help to shape you as a parent. Accept them for who they are and cherish your relationship with them, knowing that you are giving them the support, love, and care they require.
Personalized Solutions for Unique Challenges:
The hardships of parenting are numerous, ranging from restless nights to temper tantrums and all in between. Instead of focusing on finding universal solutions that apply to you and your child, compare your problems to those of others. Recognize that you are doing your best while learning and growing as a team.
Honouring Your Strengths:
You are uniquely strong and qualified to care for your child as a parent because of these qualities. It’s alright if these qualities differ from those exhibited by other parents on social media. Think about your strengths and the positive influence you have on your child’s life. Recognize that your devotion, love, and commitment are priceless and much transcend any approval or comparison from the outside.
Shifting Focus to Meaningful Connections:
Comparison frequently originates from the need for affirmation and reinforcement from other people. But it’s crucial to shift your attention to supportive networks and meaningful relationships that actually comprehend and value your path. Find parenting groups, both online and offline, where you can exchange experiences, ask for advice, and get the understanding and support you need. Be in the company of others who value and recognize your special parenting traits.
Embracing Self-Compassion:
It’s essential for parents to engage in self-compassion practices in a culture that frequently values success and perfection. Keep in mind that you are a human and that it’s normal to encounter obstacles and make mistakes along the path. Choose to enjoy the happy, developing, and resilient moments that you and your child share instead of obsessing over perceived flaws. Recognize that your love and efforts are what really matter, and allow yourself to be flawed.
Keep in mind that you are the best parent a child could ask for since the traits that count most are love, dedication, and unshakable commitment. Allow yourself to be unique, respect your strengths, and set off on this incredible adventure with pride and confidence.
Share this with your fellow parents and tell us your experiences in the comment below.
Neha Savla
Neha Mital
Mansi Zaveri
Vaishnavi Venkatraman
