Are Your Kids Learning To Be Patient?

Kanika G is a mother and the author of the Tania series of books, a series she started to entertain her daughter. In the Tania series, Kanika writes the experiences of a schoolgirl named Tania and uses simple everyday experiences for the plots that, though completely fictitious, could very well be true. Her daughter is her biggest critic and helps her with constructive criticism. Writing the books has helped mother and daughter bond and spend a lot of time together. 

Toys  available in the market today are so exciting. They light up, make noise, sing, and dance. They talk and walk and roll and fly. They are so flashy and colourful, that even grown ups find them hard to resist. But many of these toys are made for instant gratification. All you have to do is push a button and magical things happen. There is a disproportionately large reward for a very small effort.

Studies have shown that patience and the ability to defer gratification for a larger pay-off are important qualities that contribute to prosperity and happiness.

Consider a modern v/s an old fashioned top:
The modern ones operate on a spring. You attach them to a handle that has a spring and then push a button and the top sings and lights up and puts on a great show. There is another variant where you rub a part of the top against the floor like you rub a matchstick to light it. In either case the show gets quite predictable and boring after doing it a few times.

Now compare this with an old fashioned top. You have to painstakingly wind a string around it and then release it correctly to get it to spin. Believe me this is not easy. It takes a lot of practice to get it to spin. But the sense of achievement you feel when it does finally work is extraordinary. You feel happy, not because of what you see, but because you made it happen with lots of hard work and practice.  Then there are so many tricks you can do with this simple toy as shown in this YouTube video . It’s not just a toy. It’s a skill that you can keep working at and see positive results.

https://youtu.be/pBNkzrJzxHM

Here are some activities that go a long way in teaching patience.

1. Making masks and other crafts:

Buy a mask from a store and no matter how fancy the mask is, how long will your child play with it? Probably 10 minutes worth. Let them learn to make a mask instead. They could spend over a good half hour enjoying themselves while they make it and then go crazy over wearing something they just made! Also now they can try variations and make so many different types of masks like a new one every time they want to be a new character.

https://youtu.be/undefined

2. Puppets and dolls:

You can get the flashy battery operated dolls that walk and talk but the range of their activities is quite limited, compared to your child’s imagination. Give children a simple puppet or stuffed doll and they will automatically exercise their imagination and the puppet or doll will take on a life of its own!

3. Gardening:

You can start with seed germination. This project can be used to teach about seeds, roots, and shoots. It’s magical to see leaves show up and seeds grow into plants but it requires patience too. Then you can go on to growing plants. There is lots to learn about soil, pests, suitable quantity of sunlight and water. The project teaches the value of moderation. Too much water or sunlight can be just as harmful as too little. There will be failures and great rewards.

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4. Shadow play:

The art of creating shadow animals using hands is an old and advanced one. You can make all kinds of animals like pigs, dogs, geese, deer and more. This art inspired me to write a children’s story called ‘The Blackout’ (It is available free as a PDF here). Click here to see a video that shows faces of famous Indians.

https://youtu.be/N75frYVO7mQ

It is simply amazing what you can do with your 2 hands, 10 fingers and a flashlight. Again, this is a skill that you can only get better at. Along the way you can learn the physics of shadows too. What makes them bigger, smaller and clearer? How do shadows change with angles made by the object with the light source? All interesting science questions and easy to experiment with.

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Please note that I do not believe all modern toys are bad or useless, or that you should deprive your children of new technology. Not at all. In fact I am a great fan of gadgets and technology and they have a lot to teach in their own way. Here I am just trying to point out, that it is also important to introduce kids to simple toys and activities that require patience and effort to master. Such activities are often overlooked today, but they do deliver their own special kind of joy and returns that our kids should not miss out on.

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