We told you exactly how parenting in the 70s and 80s was much simpler than it is now. Back then, there were just two types- good and bad parenting. But now, so many subsets of parenting have cropped up, leaving us parents confused and bewildered at the same time. There’s Helicopter parenting, Tiger parenting, Permissive parenting, Neglectful parenting and the list is endless.
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Love vs Rules:
As a mom to a 3 year old girl, I am often caught between conflicting emotions. I wonder if I should pamper by child with all the love and dance to her tunes or enforce a strict discipline pattern that will help ease the things in the future (probably!) I often take the middle path and the question of ‘whether I am doing it right’ always bothers me. If I insist at 10 pm that my daughter cleans up her building blocks before jumping to bed, I get the glare from my husband saying that I should ‘let go’ and not ‘nag’ the child!
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It really got me thinking whether I was doing it right. Was enforcing discipline, now considered ‘nagging’? I was wondering as I browsed the net for some support and agreement. That’s when I came upon this article that states this unbelievable fact!
University of Essex research:
University of Essex has come up with this study that states girls whose “main parent”-that’s usually the mother-consistently displayed high parental expectations were far less likely to fall into the traps that made the girls less likely to succeed in life. The publication titled Behind every successful woman is a nagging mom? Teenage girls more likely to succeed if they have pushy mothers, talks about how such girls end up going to jobs with higher wages, are less likely to remain unemployed and would attend universities. The researchers, led by PhD candidate Ericka G. Rascon-Ramirez, studied the experiences of more than 15,000 British girls aged 13 and 14 over a 10-year period.
This study was conducted among the British teenage girls, which records the highest rate of adolescent motherhood across entire Europe. Researcher Ericka Rascon-Ramirez said, ‘In many cases we succeeded in doing what we believed was more convenient for us, even when this was against our parents’ will. But no matter how hard we tried to avoid our parents’ recommendations, it is likely that they ended up influencing, in a more subtle manner, choices that we had considered extremely personal”.
East vs West:
Of course, as both a daughter and now a mother, I can relate to both sides of the story. But the parenting atmosphere in the West is vastly different from that in our country. The influence of a parent extends way more than the toddler and teenage years and grows right up to the grandchildren stage. The concept of living together, respecting their views and involving them in major family decisions is something that pertains strictly to our culture. And we have agreed upon the role of a parent and the influence in our success,for generations now!
So, the next time your little girl revolts, just show her this article and tell her, “I told you so!”
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Mansi Zaveri
Gopika Kapoor
