The last time my kids went to school was mid-March. They have been home for 6 months now. Of this most of the time has been complete isolation from everyone. Being stuck at home can be incredibly frustrating as a parent, but it’s more difficult for children.
Kids by nature are meant to run around free, spending their days playing with their friends and just having fun. But being stuck at home and not having meeting others can take a toll on them. They are creatures of habit and thrive when there is some kind of routine and social interaction involved. But the current pandemic has put an end to their daily visits to the park, going for a walk, hugging and playing games. All these have been firstly restricted for hygiene and then in the form of home quarantine.
This has resulted in kids going through a lot of emotional upheavals. When it all began, the kids were excited to be at home. However, with the extension of restrictions like social distancing and restriction on physical activity, the effects on the physical and mental health of our young ones are now showing up prominently and here’s how you can help your little ones deal with it.
Talk, Talk & Talk
Children tend to rely on their imaginations when they lack adequate information. Adults’ decisions to withhold information are usually more stressful for children than telling the truth in age-appropriate ways. Explain the situation to the child according to his/her age. The child should have the freedom to ask questions about the pandemic and should know that he will not be lied to.
Take the time to talk about any worries, fears they may have that you may not be aware of, but don’t push for too much information just now, just spend time with your child. Children need to feel safe, secure, and positive about their present and future. Adults can help by focusing on children’s attention on stories about how people come together, find creative solutions to difficult problems
Get Them Moving
My friend’s 6-year-old daughter after the first few weeks was unable to sleep. She tossed and turned in bed for more than an hour. Initially, she thought it was fear that was keeping her awake. But it was something else. She just wasn’t tired enough. A lot of kids are having difficulty in sleeping as they aren’t getting tired as much as they normally did – going to school, running in the park, going for extra-curricular activities took up a lot of energy. What parents should look at doing is concentrating on early dinners and fun physical activities at home to help them burn all that extra energy.
Strengthen the Connections
My son came and asked me “Mom when this gets over, can I go and hug my best friend and just play in the park?” He’s missing his friends. He misses the interaction. The fights over the football and whose team he’s going to play in. Social isolation is taking a toll on our kids. My husband and I are making sure the kids speak to either their friends, grandparents and cousins every day. Some form of interaction through telephonic calls or video calls is helping ensure that they are maintaining their social relationships and feel that they still know what’s happening in the lives of everyone they care about.
Both my kids are good storytellers and I have asked them to journal their thoughts, fears, moments of excitement. If they want, they share it with me and we talk about things that are bothering them or making them smile. But I don’t push too much. Just keep an eye from the sidelines so that I know everything is OK. Having said that, the positive effects of dinner-time conversations with the family cannot be emphasized enough.
Weighty Issues
Kids everyone seem to have put on so much weight suddenly. Obesity in kids is a serious concern in India. The lack of proper exercise, sleep routine and the constant need to eat as they are ‘bored’ is affecting their metabolism. We need to ensure that the food they are eating is healthy, nutritious and spaced out. Quantity needs to be kept an eye on along with the quality of what they are eating. Obviously, we need our moments of indulgence at this time too. So, plan your meals keeping that in mind. Sticking to a meal plan that the family likes is such a life-saver. Trust me on this one!
Practice the 3 R’s:
Lockdown and the negative news around us have created anxiety, fear, uncertainty and insecurity within children. They have a fear of losing their parents or family members to the deadly virus and they miss meeting their friends in person. Children act out for different reasons. Testing boundaries and misbehaving is something that all children will do to some extent as they grow up, so there’s no need for parents to feel a sense of failure. We should all try to practice the 3 R’s: Reassurance, Routines, and Regulation.
First, reassure your kids about their safety and the safety of loved ones, and tell them that it is adults’ job to ensure their safety. Second, keep to a routine to provide children with a sense of safety and predictability (e.g., regular bedtimes and meals, daily schedules for learning and play). And third, support children’s development of regulation. When children are stressed, their bodies respond by activating their stress response systems. It is important to both validate their feelings. It could be “I know that this might feel scary or overwhelming” but don’t worry we are there for you. Why don’t we do some breathing exercises together to help you calm down”.
As a parent, I am struggling with emotions too, but it is my job to prepare my kids for any uncertainty. We must teach them that these are tough times and these too shall pass. Parents need to keep the kids motivated, cheerful and find ways to channelize their energies so that when they go back to school or start meeting their friends in person, they are mentally and physically alert and ready to start the new phase of their lives. All these preparations will definitely lead to a win-win situation and we would all come out strong soon.
Kyuki Agar Tayari sahi hai toh Jeet Pakki Hain
In Association with ICICI Prudential Life .For T/C, click here.
Rati Ramadas Girish
Khyati Bheda
Harshita Pande
Rushita Sheth
Tanya Lemos
KSP Team
