Twitterati have had a busy week. Two tweets have have gone viral, these have portrayed help/babysitters in poor light and have inflamed people across India. A few years ago, Indian diplomat to the US, Devyani Khobragade made headlines for not paying the legal minimum wages for her house help. There was an incident reported at Gurugram recently of how a domestic help was thrashed in the house by the employers and police had to intervene and save the young girl.  How did we as a country that believes in respect and appreciation fall so short when it comes to our help? It is time we finally addressed the elephant in the room.
Reports suggest India depends on domestic help a lot more than most countries. And it is true. One of the major reasons my family moved back to India is because we could afford and hire help. Raising two kids and working with no help showed its strain on me and my husband and we knew we could function better as a family if we had help. In India you can easily hire help to clean your home, cook, and even employ someone to play/watch your kids. And frankly- there is no definite rule of minimum wages imposed upon in our country, but salaries are fixed according to the norms in the neighbourhood. In spite of the prominent role domestic help plays in the lives of India’s middle/upper class, they are still treated differently within and outside the four walls of our homes. They aren’t allowed to talk to guests; they remain confined in a small space within the house; they don’t use the same furniture as us,and in some worst cases- they aren’t even offered the same food that we eat- leftovers is all they get.
A recent report on how much Indians pay their domestic help was published in Quartz. Below are two charts showing how babysitters and maids are paid in the top-tier cities in India:
Baby sitting:
With more and more nuclear families mushrooming in India, there has been a surge in the middle class hiring help to look after their children, Women are hired to clean, cook and even play and entertain children when parents are off to work. This means a child ends up spending almost the whole day with the help and therefore develops a very strong bond with the nanny. Parents too become so dependent on them that they end up taking them to restaurants, family outings, and even on vacation. And that is when the world gets to see how we Indians really treat our domestic help.
Beginning right from rhymes to teaching them how to speak, our children learn a lot from our help and we parents must confess that life has been easier for many of us thanks to our help, so shouldn’t we reciprocate this favour by making our homes a better place to work for them?
Image Source: Facebook
What you should do:
- Treat your help with respect. This is just basic. Whether at home or outside, it is basic to treat them with dignity and respect. Let’s accept it- we need their services to raise our child. Paying a salary doesn’t quantify everything.
- Your baby learns from you:Â Using derogatory or singular words will only teach your child to use it to them later when they start to talk. Instill values in your little one and ensure the help is addressed with respect. Nothing is more painful for a person than a 2-year old abusing them. Keep that in mind.
- Try to plan your outside visits in advance. If it is a personal event that you are attending and you wouldn’t feel too comfortable with the nanny hovering behind your child- inform them in advance and give them a day off. Instead don’t take them over to a place- weddings, hotels, etc and then treat them as outsiders and ostracize them. If you can include them in your group and provide them a meal at restaurants- it would mean so much to the person who spends as much time as family with you.
- Take interest in their lives and help them build a better future. Small contributions – be it helping them open a savings account or buying their kids’ school books would mean a lot for them and their children.
- Give them their scheduled holidays. Everyone needs a break from work. Don’t’ deprive them of their right to holidays so that your child would be taken care of 24×7.
- Once your child grows up and their services aren’t needed- make sure you speak/meet them once a while. They will only be too happy to check on how the child- they raised- is doing in life.
You may also like:Â The Maid Test
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KSP Team
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Rushita Sheth
Mansi Zaveri
